Reports

Ahh, the time of the year that teacher’s look forward too.

Right now I am working away the reports for my grade and I am just about over them.  I wish I could write;

1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.

2. I would not allow this student to breed.

3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.

4. Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them,

6. The student has a ???Full Six-Pack???, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.

7. This child has been working with glue too much.

8. When your daughter???s I.Q. reaches 50, she should sell.

9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn???t coming.

10. If this student were any more stupid, he???d have to be watered twice a week.

11. The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.

Tags: humour, education, reports, report card